Whether or not you are an avid social media consumer or a casual user, it is hard not to have heard the term ‘trad wife’, which has been circulating the feeds of popular social media platforms for the past few months. Trad wives or traditional wives are women who lean into traditional gender practices and lifestyles. The NYT defines trad wives as “[a woman] typically a conservative Christian, ‘who prefers to take a traditional or ultratraditional role in marriage, including the belief that a woman’s place is in the home.’” While this may not seem like a new concept, the interconnection with social media is and has significantly impacted the narrative that trad wives portray to the public in our current society.

I will admit that before I became aware of the term, even I was unknowingly engaging with so-called ‘trad wife’ content. However, like many self-proclaimed feminists within the creative media sphere who have criticized this phenomenon, I find myself bringing up the same important ongoing argument about ‘trad wives’: lack of transparency, glamorization, and the promotion of harmful gender-role rhetoric.

One thing that feminists can agree on is that what a woman chooses to do with her own life is her choice. Whether that be a 9-5 corporate job or a stay-at-home mom, they have the freedom to live their own life. Yet, what many feminists find issue with and what I find to be problematic is the glamorization and an image of an idealized trad wife lifestyle that often does not address the money, classism, and stability that is involved. Especially when now more than ever there is an increase in younger audiences that are constantly on social media which means the chances of such influences affecting younger generations is becoming more and more likely.

Some of the most prominent ‘trad wife’ content creators include Hannah Neelemen, also known as Ballerina Farm, Nara Smith, and Estee Williams. These creators often go viral for posting content about their ‘normal’ daily life, including making food from scratch in unattainable designer clothing and using expensive appliances costing from 2,000 to 5,000 dollars. One of the most well-known, Neelemen recently came into the limelight after an article that revealed her family dynamics, especially her relationship with her husband Daniel who is the son of Jet Blue Airlines founder and CEO. In an Rolling Stone article, Neelemen stated that she does not explicitly embrace this label and has said on USA Today that, “ he does not necessarily identify with it.” One of the trends that is becoming more apparent of trad wife creators is the spectrum in which they embrace and do not embrace the trad wife label. There are some like Neelemen who try to distance themselves, however, on the other end of the spectrum there are creators like Williams, who speaks regularly to the media about their lifestyle choices.

While taking on such labels created by the public is not always a comfortable notion, as creators for a public space they have some level of responsibility to be honest about their lifestyle. However, from what we have seen that is not always the case.

It is often certain narratives and ideologies that promotes ideas such as this article from Women’s Agenda: “Marriage is a bond and it’s a sacred bond – you have to protect that at all costs, and I think part of that is putting your partner’s needs before your own every single day.” While it is up to women to make their own choices there is a fine line between embracing and living such a lifestyle and promoting a lifestyle for the public that does not disclose the intent and curation that goes into producing the image that many trad wives’ creators portray online. Not only does this give a message to younger audiences that this sort of lifestyle is realistic and common, but it also allows them to believe such lifestyle is achievable without knowing the context or the financial means behind it thus promoting un realistic gender-role standards.

So, the next time you go on social media look through the content you are engaging with, see behind the lens and be more conscious about what you are watching. Most if not all the time there is more to social media content than what meets the eye.